One thing i know about me is I owe a lot of living to myself, Im in debt to this thing called life... I havnt paid enough love, pain, tears, fears and joy yet. I am gracious to my landlord, he takes it day in and day out. But I am also sure of his own debt, which nags at me spiritually till grasciousness is lulled into esacement from duty. I know he has his own landlord, and he has his own issue with his own self frustration. The trend continues on and on. Simultaneously we all just act like conveyor belts, within some 3rd demension startosphere, passing off what is each others exemption till nothing seems pressing. In time, judges or personal markers, will deminish our self truths. And Isnt it always a matter of time though, how long will it take to get to the next level? will the time in between spent getting there be disgracefull compared to others? will full potential be completely achieved? and will it be by my standards that I have made it, or theirs? The ratio is off que whatever I do and I do not know If anything will do now.

Blah, I have had to much shit to do. Maybe this is what it is about, i mean the excuse of never getting around to what we want to do. We know we wont live up to what we expect of ourselves and only push half ass untill the day comes that we do try. And since fare wheather aspirations are no longer optional you have the excuse you never had time. Its another issue dealing with self knowledge. Our aspiration clouds our views. We live in a different world half the day which stalls for time. That different world changes us into the people of missing marks in what we want to be. Realization is of no help though, it becomes like a pointing finger eventually, never really doing much other than making you turn your head, and maybe your cheek.

falling asleep is like giving wounds time to scab over. Life un-constricted can be lived in sleep. The parallel universe which we intoxicate ourselves with is all that keeps our most unique and lively desires from forming the hardest of shells. The bones rattling from strenuous work are absorbed into the four posts of our homely beds. Sleep is not being close To having ceased to live, its an act which brings you closer to the true potentials of life. Nights of sleep are so much more attracting than that of the whip and the sun. Days are harsh, especially in today's society. Nothing, and i mean nothing, is good enough for anyone awake. Relationships are abruptly ended under the worst pretenses such as problems with too much sex, or too much attention twoards the opposite genger. Or a part time employee is let go not because his attendance and service are flawless, but because the company of small stature does not have the height for people to be able to see over these skyscrapers.

Children end up growing in the mental extent to the age of 45 before they hit 20 just because immaturity, a process of life, is no longer deemed acceptable. Modern culture of today is so disillusioned with power, greed, wealth, ignorance, and divine right. Donald trump is like the the american government, he seeks control over means to means. The only thing left to people is the mean to inhabbit a unsympathetic country.

Everything is out of touch with reality in this society, which works well for destroying the planet, human nature, and culture. Life in the old days, men and women stayed together for means of surviving and could not afford to break up for small reasons. Businesses never went out of business because they were mostly farms, and if the said happend, they simply self sustained themselves for existance. The world is a mess, the world is terrifying, the world is "modern"- how laughable.

The life will fall out of everyone eventually for eternal sleep under this oppression, but alas its eternal peace. What better way to keep living though than by, getting close to being fully happy and content due to the nourishing and imaginative abilities which sleep brings. Maybe we can harbor whats in our dreams, in the ports of our actually daily living lives. Its better than giving into today's pressures as a passive pushover.